• Vineet Agarwal

Communication Vs. Integrity

What I will NOT be discussing here in the above topic of today :

• Communication Skills

• Any stuff related to Visual, Vocal and Verbal

• Art of Listening

• Conflict Handling

• Questioning Techniques

• Feedback exchange

Enough of the workshops get regularly conducted on above by experts and trainers in almost all walks of life, not just corporates. THEN WHAT ?

It’s about the “Integrity Aspect” behind any communication serving as foundation of any relationship, be it ‘Personal or Professional’. While I wrote these last two words, I have an overriding thought just now, compelling enough to share my additional views. All thick lines between so called ‘Personal or Professional’ are drawn out of ‘Social Hypnosis’. When life energies are at play for us to strive through success and happiness, personal and professional goals get mingled with barely visible thin liners. Eventually our interiority comes to the fore, “The way we do one thing, the way we do everything” !!

So what are the key highlights of “Integrity Aspect” ?

• It’s about the feelings left over after the words have been exchanged.

• It’s about relationship completion against a commitment.

• It’s about proactive answering back to somebody’s expectation/proposal, even if it’s a ‘no’ !!

• It’s about making an advance connect to people who care about us/whom we should care.

• It’s about our energy alignment over agreements we consciously made.

• It’s about reflecting genuine interest in people.

• It’s about respecting humanity with equality.

• It’s about gratitude mode of interaction.

My sincere urge to the reader is to go through the above pointers once again before moving forward, this time more empathically. Now correlate these with the incidents you have faced or caused to others. Few examples :

When we are made to wait for an hour or two, just out of some ridiculous authoritativeness.

When someone doesn’t pick up your multiple calls, even after giving a benefit of doubt of some emergency situations, there is not even a text revert. And if there is a text revert, people conveniently forget after another reminder. How about when that person is closely known ?

When a so called old friend or relative remembers you after few years, only to seek your favor !!

When there is a sudden u-turn after traversing few miles together !!

When there is no timely information of a change of mind or any situational outcome...and many more.

This list could be endless. The matter could be subjectively small or big, but any “out of integrity” behavior surely pricks the feelings, causing corresponding dent in the relationship. Unless it is cured, it remains there and grows with time; howsoever we hide behind the “socially designed decorum” or “long term business interest”. That’s how human mindset works in day to day life, unless we transcend and be discriminate about workability and morality.

It’s such a short sightedness not to realize that huge Costs get incurred out of non-integrity, that too in long term. By that time, damages are irreparable!! And now when the whole globe is interconnected 24x7, even in a remote island, any excuse is clearly understood by others!!

So, when self integrity inherently expects us doing the right things when nobody is watching, integrity towards others demands keeping our word, and over time. That’s it!! Emphasizing ‘That’s it’ doesn’t mean we forego human compassion and don’t accommodate sporadic deviations.

However especially in business setup, if we don’t keep our word at all or over time, then as soon as we are aware of it, we should make a conscious effort to immediately inform all the related people.

– Sincerely Apologize.

– Genuinely write/talk/explain all the circumstances which led to breaking of commitment.

– Provide revised date or alternative option.

– Highlight the new plans envisaged to circumvent the older situations and to make it happen this time.

– If possible and required, supplement with incentives against any material damage.

Act with all the might as per the renewed plan keeping related people timely updated.

Any slightest loss of integrity has to be re-established with those efforts and communication, which can be genuinely felt and appreciated by others. The relationship bond thus strengthened surmounts all challenges, bearing long term sustainable fruits of success and happiness.

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